Crazy Faith!

I have been trying to keep my hope alive for the promise of a child. I know that he/she/they are coming, I can feel it in my bones! I am literally behaving as if it has already begun for example. 

I found a picture on Google of a random newborn baby picture and put as my lock screen on my phone! So everytime I unlock my phone, I am constantly reminded of the beautiful baby I HAVE! 

Then, I parked in the New/Expected parking space and just sat staring at the sign...well, until a real new mom needed it! But all I'm saying is, sometimes you have to show some CRAZY FAITH to get some MIRACULOUS RESULTS! I'm tunnel focused. Getting this weight off and when I'm done, I will go to a reproductive specialist (appt set for July 25th) and I will  get pregnant THIS YEAR! 

Update on my journey...

I am so glad I get to hit the reset button every time I wake up! Thank God I am able to try to be better, stronger, wiser, and smarter! This week, I will be trying on my new size 16 jeans of which I started at size 20! When I restarted my journey last November, I was a little scared to try them on because I felt like I was going to get disappointed. If I can't fit them, then it's just more motivation for me. I have been taking resolution drops and lost 4lbs this week as well. I have not been taking it properly. But now I'm on it! Ten drops under the tongue was too much, so I'm doing five drops and 1200-1300 calorie diet. Now, the diet is the hard part! I will try on the jeans on Wednesday after I get a colonic! Lol

Does Resolution Drops really work?

So I'm on my way to losing more weight and I heard about this Resolution drops and thought maybe I should try it. Now, I will do the plan for 30 days exactly as prescribed and will be able to let you guys know whether or not it was an enhancement to my weight loss. Currently, I have been losing about 10 to 15 pounds a month. I have 70 more pounds to lose. Once I get down to my healthy weight then I will retry the fertility process. Thanks for walking with me on this journey!

Gave up and then started again

So I was in the process of giving up and then about a day later, I realized that if I gave up, I would be a quitter! And momma didn't raise no quitter! So today, I am jumping back on the horse. The only thing I need to do is continue to believe that the promise of my family is near. It's going to be quite a story to tell, but once this part of my life is fulfilled, I would feel complete.

Going the Ishmael Route

I'm sorry I've been gone a while. I buried myself in work after the last test was negative. I'm feeling close to hopelessness of having this baby naturally. I'm trying not to go to reproductive medicine. Just a simple check up is $400! I have Obamacrap but it doesn't cover much. Pray for my strength as I stand on God's promise to us. Tens years ago, it was spoken over us that we shall have two children. We even have the names already. So if you read the bible, you will know that Abraham and his wife Sarai was old with no kids. It took 25 years for the promise of the kid to come to past. But before that, that thought they was supposed to use a surrogate as the method. God told Abraham that's not the promise child! But I'm go make sure he good though. I keep thinking about going the Ishmael route (using a surrogate) but that's not what we're supposed to do. But I'm feeling why Abraham did it though!

CLEARblue as day...

Well ladies, its back to the drawing board. Its 15 DPO and its negative. No period yet but thats weird...hmmm. In lighter news, I lost 22lbs!!!

It's all about the PORTIONS baby!

I'm starting to see that it is really all about the portion sizes I have a plate that is compartmentalized so that I can stay in control of how much I'm eating. I always put veggies in the large tray and meat and starch in the small. I also have a scale so that I can weigh my meat. On the quick weight-loss plan you can have 8 ounces of chicken but you can only have 5 1/2 ounces of steak. I'm hoping I am helping someone by sharing my journey. 

In other news there is only one week left before I can start testing for pregnancy. In a way, I am kind of hoping that I am pregnant, but then again I would like for another month to cycle so I can get more weight down. I do still have three months within the first trimester to lose a few more pounds but after that I will continue eating healthy but not focus so much on a 1200 cal diet because it would not be healthy.